Yes, so I went on for a while about "There you go" because it's bothered me for a long time. The way people use language in general has always interested me. Can't help noticing these things, and then making fun of them. I had a great time when "My bad" first got popular. A lot of people get really pissed when you goof on their new speech patterns. I think it's more a case of people not liking having to think about themselves, their lives, and the way they relate to the world.

The easiest way to piss anyone off is to ask him to think about his beliefs. Never does a simple "Why?" cause more damage.

I tried to gain popularity for the phrases "My good" and "It's all bad" for when I did something correctly or someone else fucked something up for me, respectively. They didn't catch on.

(That last was pronounced "S'all baad," by the way.)

Here are two new things I've heard a lot more lately (not to say they're new, just that they're being used a lot): "Exactly" and "Pretty much."

If you make a somewhat witty or wry observation about work, usually to the effect of "The management doesn't give a fuck about us workers" or "Our coworker's a two-faced whore," and the person you're talking to is in agreement but has nothing to add, he'll say, "Exactly" or "Pretty much." They both mean the same thing.

"Exactly" is almost always pronounced "Egg-ZAAKK-ly" with a bit of a drop in tone at the end.

"Pretty much" is usually said with a slight smirk, but not a happy one. More like the expression to accompany "Man, I can't believe how the powers that be in this country continually fucks us. This sucks."

Many times, the person will only be agreeing with you because you're standing in front of him and the person you're talking about isn't. In that case, people being the gutless sheep they are these days, he won't want to add to what you're saying, but he wants to stay on your good side, so saying, "Pretty much," allows him to agree with you without anyone accusing him of also being against the person in question.

Yesterday, I said something to the effect of "customers suck" and a coworker responded, "Exactly. Pretty much." Very little pause there. He wasn't correcting himself.

Later I said to this same guy something like "Money sure sucks on Friday nights lately." "Exactly."

Then, "All women love to fuck random guys." "Exactly."

So basically, if you make an observation that someone else doesn't disagree with, but can't really contribute to, either because you said it so well or he's too busy to really care (like with "There you go"), he'll either say "Exactly" or "Pretty much."

I've noticed for over ten years that Americans are devolving into a race of nonsense phrase spouting absent-minded morons. At least there are a few variations in the phrases along the way.

An example for waiters: If you see someone sitting at a table in your restaurant that you were at one time very friendly with but haven't seen in a while, find an excuse to go talk to the people at his table, like refill drinks or drop off some food. While there, ask, "How is everyone?" Your old friend will glance at you and say, "Howyadoin'" with the usual lack of enthusiasm everyone has when slinging that phrase out to people he doesn't know. But he will most likely glance at you briefly as or after he says it and then he'll recognize you. Then he'll ask you how you're doing, even though he just asked less than a minute ago. He only meant it the second time, obviously.

It's because of stupid observations like this that I frequently hear "You've got WAAAY too much time on your hands."

They're right. I suppose I could be out drinking a beer right now, or watching television. Maybe both at once.

Worthless fact: I never ask anyone how he's doing unless I genuinely give a shit.